Wednesday, May 08, 2013


If you follow this blog you may have wondered if I fell of the planet or something. No... I've just had a lot of thoughts going through my mind and very few of them were shareable. None of those things are resolved or dealt with or anything like that... but I started to feel as if those things have begun taking over my life, crowding out the good stuff, choking off the sunshine.

But I'll push myself up through the dirt and shake my petals free...

That's from a song by Dar Williams. One that I can barely remember how to play on the guitar. But I love it anyway and it always makes me feel a little better. So, onward and upward, right?

Kevin and I built a raised bed garden. It's a rather late start, but there wasn't any real way to avoid that. There were family things going on, rainy weather on the weekends (the only time we could work on it), and other things. Last weekend we were able to finish the fence and get the seeds in the ground. I'm a little worried about the tomatoes, but if they don't grow then we'll figure out something else. Gardening... I have missed that so very much! To touch the soil, to know that the seeds will soon become plants that will feed you and nourish your body, to know that you played a part in that. I am really looking forward to the first taste of fresh veggies.

I've also been absent from my cardio workouts, but not the strength-training. That, too has come to an end. The absence, not the workouts. My calves have felt on fire for the last two days, but that's completely acceptable and I'm viewing it as the phoenix rising from the ashes (nail in the foot, sunburn, and some weird cold). Now I'm ready to rise up stronger.

There are other things that I want to spill out through this keyboard. Pieces of my heart, thoughts that keep me awake, dreams that feel like ashes. But I know that won't bring more light into this world, so I will leave them unsaid and unwritten. Instead, I will continue doing my best to smile and help hold the world in love.

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