Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Struggle

There are just some days when it's harder to hold onto the faith that everything will be okay. I know, in my head, that things will even out and the sparkle of the day will return. I can tell myself that the weeks of brightness weren't an aberration and that they will return. I can push myself to believe that the smiles and easy-going laughter were not the exception, but were the normal.

But when it stops abruptly, when the world just seems dismal, when it seems there isn't anywhere to turn for comfort... it is hard to keep believing.

Yes, this is where some of my moments have been. I don't share all the negative stuff simply because I think the world has enough and doesn't need mine added to it. Today, though... today feels like there is an attack coming from all fronts and I stand in the middle, doing my best to battle it all. And keeping that smile plastered to my face so that the rest of the world doesn't see how hard I'm struggling to stay on my feet. To stay cheerful. To stay positively focused on the good things.

Days like this the simple gift of knowing that I do have people out there who love me, is the only thing that keeps me going.

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